Monday, October 31, 2011

Your Soul To Mine

A mist of sadness settled in my eyes since the day, the Earth took you back. Memories played themselves, over and over, till they eventually faded away into the silence of the room. I counted on my fingertips, the infinite ways, I had held you in a bubble of love, close to my beating heart. Your laughter, still lingering somewhere in the corner of my mind, from the last time you spoke to me. My sight, limited by the veil of this humanly plane, failed to find your loving eyes, continuing to watch me grow into the woman I am. I knocked on the empty space, left inside, to trace the physical bond of you and I, but I was only greeted by my own heavy sighs.

Yet somewhere, amidst the angry static of the world, you reached out to me in all the different ways. I heard your soul fluttering in the wings of the birds, encircling the orange sky. I heard your soul in the hustling of the red and yellow autumn leaves, patiently waiting for a new season. I heard your soul roar in the ocean's waves, as it touched the shore of my life. I heard your soul rejoice in the sudden burst of a child's laughter and yet I heard it cry, a thousand tears of separated lovers. I heard you speak to me in a language beyond words.

This lifted the curtain of my mind and I could see the days, when we all were merely unborn bones, burning with the Radiance of His Light and carrying the torches of His Love in a world where everything was created as one. It was this very place where you and I were moulded into these bodies and it is this very place, where you and I shall meet once more, for death, can never tear love apart.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Fall

Angered the man said to his Lord: I carried the burden of the entire world on my back for You, how could You not have been there for me, when I could no longer carry it?
He Softly Smiled: My child, did you not notice I Created the entire ground and covered it with lush garden to break your fall?

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

I Live

I tasted you, My Lord, somewhere in the corner of my very soul. I had mistaken all the hues of grey of my own existence, to be Your Life Force until You Dawned the Rainbow of Your Love on me.

Disconnected from myself by the fear of my small mind, I had looked into those vacant eyes and twisted smiles, unable to recognize any part of them in me. But between the spaces, when words fell away and You Came Alive in the silence, I became still enough to feel their little hearts skipping with excitement in mine. I touched their crooked hands and felt the Divinity of Your Essence. I gazed at their imperfect faces, to find Your Absolute Perfection Looking back at me.

I saw strands of brilliant, bright, white, light, between the colourless darkness and I recognized each of them to be Yours. I See You, my Beloved, in the changing seasons which we speak of as life. I feel You, my Beloved, in the face of death, that merely gives way to a new life being born. I breathe You, My Lord, with every breath I surrender to this Earth.

I raise my head high up towards the sky, as the wind gently whispers Your Name in my ears and I live, My Lord. And I live.

Monday, October 24, 2011

The Day He Took You

This is a dedication to my grandfather, who carried immense love in his heart

I dreamt of you today,
Holding those weary dreams under the yellow street lights, somewhere in the middle of the road to Heaven,
You laid wide awake in your sleep, while the world around you laid peacefully in their slumber,
I heard the sky thunder as He Called for you to return to His Majestic Kingdom,
You softly smiled with tears in your eyes as you shed this earthly skin,
The angels happily welcomed you onboard the Train of Light to carry you to His Door,
I stood at this life’s gate, gently waving you this temporary goodbye, quietly kissing the afterglow of your love as it left a trial behind,
I watched the ground open its heart to forever hold you close,
It told me not to weep, as your soul had been so kind, it would give more life to the flowers and the trees,
It told me death can never be the end of love, it is just a new start,
With that, I woke up to hear your heart beat in mine and I wiped away a tear as I thanked you for all the thousand silent moments that we spent between our smiles,
And I knew, till we meet again, you would always live inside my heart.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Forever Love - Goodbye

This letter is a dedication to the place inside me that is ornamented with all of your essence, before the shift in my Earth, covers it in the pages of my history.

Like many lifetimes before, I stood outside the temple of your love, wondering if I should climb the stairs leading to the altar of your heart. I wondered, if I should ring the rusted bells to awaken the lost songs of my devotion, that I chanted in your name. The demons of my past, disguised as the rays of hope, beckoned me to come closer. They softly whispered memories in my ears, till my eyes were filled with your loving smiles. Forgetting myself, I took a step forward, but the hem of my soul got tangled in the thorn of the black rose, hiding in your garden. Hurrying to reach you, I tugged to let myself free. Instead, it cut right through, reminding me why my worship of you had always been in vain. Unable to bear the hurt, I wore my armour to hide the pain and turned away.

I decided, to roll a boulder on the space left empty to stop my feelings from fluttering away and turned the volume of my thoughts down, so I could recognize the noise speaking inside of me.

I had always waded around the black and white pool of your carefully woven reality, dipping my toes precariously in the water, which burnt with the cold of your silence. Yet, again and again, I came around, certain, the warmth of my touch against your sacred skin, would melt the defenses, you had set up tactfully against my entry. I was wrong.

My mind, created a special place in your heart where I could forget myself and rise and fall to your breathing. Reality, hit it with a 7.1 and left behind dust for the ground to sweep. Still not convinced, I chased the storm. Breathless, I stood before the sea, watching the sun shining in the waves, wondering, why I had put down my “Fool in Love” card when, all this time, you were waiting to be wooed by the queen of spades. I walked to the places where you once held me in the strength of your arms, while I helplessly cried at our fortune. I stopped there to see if I could find parts of you that were lost in the battle of this separation. Yet, my courage failed each time the waves of sorrow crashed and drowned the golden stream in the darkness. And so I left those places behind too.

Frightened, the child inside me, ran in the distant forest, leaving no trace. The promise of you always finding me when I was lost, had followed me blindly. But by the time, I stopped in the middle of the wilderness, there was no you to be found. Unable to move, I watched the silvery sky cover the aurora of the northern star, which lighted the way back. I was all alone, in a place, I had no sense of navigation of.

I closed my eyes, and went back to the comfort of where I mapped out every inche of your body with the passion of my lips. Back to the place where I laid peacefully on your chest and let you run inside the blood in my veins. In those brief moments, my world was small enough to bounce in the spaces between our breaths. For there was nothing in it, except for the way my body held you within itself.

All this made me wonder, if on some days, your mind could still recall me laughing, as we watched my feet dance in your lap. If you regretted, not wiping the angry tears, I tried so hard not to show you. I quietly wondered, if you would have so easily said goodbye that day, you kissed my cheek before you ran to catch the plane, if you knew that it would be the last time you would see me. Would you have held back from what defined you and given yourself up to let me see you completely naked? Could there ever really be a chance, you understood that I loved you unconditionally, long before you could even think it as possible. I thought, if ever, I’ll become a tear in your eye and follow the path down your face that once my fingertips memorized. I shook my head, knowing somewhere, it had always been me who held out my open arms while you were too busy distracting yourself.

So, I retraced my steps back, to the eternity I felt while I waited for your lips to meet mine, just once. I picked up the heaviness in my heart, I hid behind a broken smile, when they never did and rocked it in my tireless arms. I, silently, held the woman, you left crying on those empty white sheets when you couldn't bare to expose your soul. I watched you peacefully lying in your own world, never really moving when I called out for your hand each time I was drowning.

I let myself drown this time alone, until my lungs gasped for air and I learnt to paddle. Soaked in your reminiscence, I wrapped all I could find of you in a piece of paper, torched it with the fire of my love and let the wind carry the ashes from my hand.

I let go, of ever wanting you to want me, in all the ways I had dreamt of wanting you. I let go, of trying to find a soft place to rest my head on, with you. I let go, of the desire to become the center of your universe, like you had been for me. This time, I decided to just let you go altogether and love you just as who you are, without ever looking back.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Dedication to the Phoenix

Why pretend that you are the broken winged bird, when He Created you from the ashes of Heaven and raised you as the Phoenix.
Why pretend that you are the wounded child, afraid from all, when you are the warrior carrying the Arrow of His love and the Message of His Peace.
Why pretend to hide and think the Universe can not see you, when each place is illuminated with the gold of your aura as you walk in.
Why pretend you stumble for words to express your beauty, when your speech is soft as the blossoming rose and intoxicates the depths of the human soul with His Longingness,
Why pretend you are the fragment of dust in the wind, when you are the very Earth revolving around the axis of His Divinity.
So why do you pretend?
You already know He Came Down when the call of your tears shook His Mighty Throne,
He Carried you all the way in His Loving Arms and Set you to sail in the Ocean of Light, until you will return home to Him.

Monday, October 17, 2011

Your Reflection

O my Beloved, my Love,
Set my soul ablaze with the Fire of Your Passion, that this wick of life, burns away in Your Calling,
Drown me, in the Ocean of Your Beingness, that I may forever swim in the knowing, that it is You who has engulfed me completely,
Carry me, my Dearest One, down those forgotten roads where none live, that I may become the whispering Winds of Your love, and breathe life into those lands,
O my Beloved,
Fill this empty vessel, that you hold gently in Your Loving Hands, till my body is drenched in the Essence of Your Fragrance and I am brought forward in this world as a Reflection of You.

Letting go

Surrender the weapons of your battles, for there is nothing in this world to be won,
Put down the guard you have constructed, for the only enemy is your raging mind,
Crumble down completely to dust, for it is the only time you will be reborn,
Allow the hand of destiny to move you, for it is the star guiding you to the harbour of your own radiance,
Fall away from all what you believe, for it is the lost seeds that grow as a garden of love,
Release the fear that has gripped your soul, for light can never shy away from darkness,
Then once you have cross the field of knowing and have entered into nothingness, that's where you will find Him, patiently waiting for you.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

I Am

I am the northern star, guiding the lost sailor's ship, back to the comfort of the harbour,
I am the highway, spread across the open sky, giving way to the dance between the moon and the sun,
I am the pillars of the Earth, holding the ground strong, to carpet each step walking away,
I am the wind, blowing through the land, offering no past and holds no future,
I am the smile, on the lover's face, upon seeing the light of her Beloved,
I am the pearl, hidden in the depths of the ocean, shining without care in the heart of darkness,
I am the call, of the morning song, softly awakening a world that lies sleeping,
I am the spring, blooming in every petal of the rose as she comes to life,
I am an intricate part of all that has been created,
Because everything is Created as an extension of You.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Infinity

The jester, knitted fairytales of woes for my heart to carry, until it turned into a black impenetrable stone, that I deemed as my precious jewel. It was only when Your Love blew through me, that I embraced the flame raging in my heart, shivering in Your Passion. It divulged me in a nameless place, where I breathe myself into You. All this while, I saw myself separated from all, until the Glow of Your Light pierced through the fog of darkness. All those ways, I deceived myself to be, unraveled at Your Feet and I looked up to see myself as an infinite perfection of You and You Alone.

Tuesday, October 04, 2011

Wheel Of Love

O mankind, you who seek your Creator,
Break your heart open, to allow it to flutter like the dove, before it takes flight,
Quiver like the Autumn leaves, waiting patiently, to kiss the ground,
Sweep the dust of your broken dreams under the rug of surrender, until each chimney is wiped clean of your will,
Swirl around in madness until your ears are only filled with the music of His Calling,
O you seekers of the truth,
The path that leads to God is easy,
It is the only one which is glorified and basked in love.

Sunday, October 02, 2011

His Love Touched Me

I hid under the sand, covering myself with rocks, so nobody could ever find me,
He Gave me Roots and Grew me as a tree, holding the blossoming flowers, that drew every sweetness present towards me,
I turned myself into the mountains, keeping myself strong and steady, so nothing could ever move me,
He Opened me up and Allowed a river to flow right through me, that gave birth to every path it turned on,
I lifted my wings and flew away as the birds, so nothing could ever follow me,
He Created the sky as my umbrella, so that I may be sheltered in its hands,wherever I choose to go,
I pulled the night's robe over me, completely certain that nothing could see me,
He Lit the moon so that I may light up, all that laid below me,
Everything I did, I saw Him Living and Growing inside me,
I held on to fear, until I froze to the point where my hands and knees were no longer part of my system,
He came down from His Throne and with His One Touch of Love, I've forgotten who I am and now I choose to dance in His Name, for all eternity.

Call me love

I'm throwing up my hands.  I don't want this war Don't let me leave Stop.  I'm throwing up my hands.  Waving the White Flag ...